Through The Eyes of a Cat

I run this house,
Not the humans,
I demand to be fed,
Whether they like it or not!

I scratch and bite at legs if I see the bottom
Of my bowl.
I like to drink out of the bathtub faucet,
Why don't they understand that?

My mouse toy is not to be bothered,
If I put it on the couch,
That is where I expect it to find it.
But no, the big humans have to put it in the toy box.

Why do I need my toys in a toy box?
I like my toys where I put them!
I hate this new food too.
The carnation milk balls taste like crap.

The liver isn't real
And the chicken doesn't smell as good
As the real chicken that just came out of the oven.
I think I will eat her tuna while she gets the mayo out.

That will teach her to leave it out of her sight!
Stupid humans!
Now it's time to go for a nap,
But where to nap so I won't be bothered?

I am going to hide under the dresser,
Then the little human can't pull on my tail while I sleep.
That is so annoying and no matter how much I scratch,
Here he comes again!

The night as fallen and the house is dark,
The female human is going to the bathroom,
She doesn't see me,
I trip her and she falls down.

Now that is great fun!
Better than the catnip mouse or the feather on a string,
Just wait until the morning
When I can start my day all over again!

Published on July 22, 2006 in