The Worst Diet Plan EverSince January of this year, I've been battling Ovarian again. Just about every two weeks I go and get the shot in my butt, making me sore for a couple of days and nauseated and unable to eat for about a week. Needless to say, I've lost weight since my photo was last taken. I've also discovered bald spots that no matter what Drag Queen I enlist to help me with my hair, we can't hide anymore. I'm considering shaving off the rest of my hair. Just seems like it would be logical since I'm losing it at an alarming rate anyways.
I'm forcing myself to get out of bed everyday to try to at least walk around the house and get some form of exercise. My mental state could be better, but most times I'm praying for death to just get this over with already. I know I shouldn't think or say things like that, but it's hard to keep my usual sunny disposition when I hurt 99% of the time. Even when I'm sleeping, something is hurting. I know the cancer hasn't spread; my oncologist keeps testing me once a month. But it's just irksome to go day in and day out in pain.
It hurts to sit and write. My laptop has been fried for a while, so writing blogs, and columns and on my next book is almost impossible for me. So if you don't hear from me for a while, it's not because I'm hiding in depression, it's just difficult for me to get someone in my family to translate notes for me. My Parkinson's has developed badly due to stress and my handwriting would make the world's best serial killer proud. Sometimes I can't even read what I wrote and then when I feel like sitting at the computer and translating out of spirals, I sometimes guess what I'm doing and it looks like the work of a pre-scholar.
Hang in there kids, pray for me and hopefully this hiatus won't be another year long one!!!
Published on 11/29/2011 in